Outfit details: Cover-up, sandals - Target. Swim top - JCrew. Bottoms - Don't remember. Hairband - Yak & Yeti (gift from my mom). Sunnies - Marc Jacobs (lost and found at my old work). Necklace - Modcloth.
I'm so glad that women came forward about their own pasts and problems after reading my last post! I don't ever want a woman to feel guilty for her emotions, and that is a big reason why I force myself to be vulnerable here. I've had men call me crazy for raising my voice in anger, and stupid for crying out of sadness. (These same men would punch holes in walls and throw inanimate objects, but let's move on.)
Please, ladies, don't believe these lies. You are not crazy, you are not stupid, and you certainly should not feel guilty for being something other than happy. This is a battle I'm still tackling today. Last week I was telling a friend, "I feel lonely, and then I feel guilty for feeling lonely. That's double the negativity!" Why not just let ourselves feel? There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. In fact, I daresay it's quite the opposite. I don't believe it's healthy to ignore our emotions, deny them, keep them inside. There are times, though, when we don't have a choice -- like in public, especially at work.
That's my problem lately. I've been so busy that I've barely had a moment to sit in silence and face how I feel. That's why I'm so glad I had the chance to leave town. Not only do I get to see my family, but I get to see myself. Words can't describe how inspiring and refreshing this week has been. Maybe you need this, too. Break the normal pattern, the busy schedule of your life, and take a breather. Get away. If you don't have the time or money for anything big, go somewhere for a night! Clear your head. Grab a book and a journal and go.
Another thing I've found about myself during this time of self-reflection is that I'm constantly searching for a balance with this blog. Aren't we all? I think we struggle with wanting to have unique traits and different ideas while, at the same time, having popular traits and relevant ideas. We want to stand out, but we want to be what readers like! Well, here's the thing: I'm a writer first and a blogger second. That's how it'll always be, and I've decided to embrace that. So if this blog becomes a novel, I'm sorry -- but not really. It's time to be true to myself, unashamedly, in every way. Your turn.